Finding Peace

“Great peace have they who love your [word], and nothing can make them stumble.”  Ps 119:165 NIV

One of the last things Jesus told His disciples before leaving this world was, “In this [life], you will have trouble!” (Jn 16:33 NIV). And He was right, wasn’t He? We all experience stress, occupational demands, deadlines, expectations, personal pressures ganging up on us and constantly trying to rob us of the peace we desperately desire. No one is immune to stress, frustration, and the feeling that we’re on the “autobahn of life.” What is all this but the absence of peace? And the answer can’t be found in a pill, a possession, or a pleasure. All those things wear off or wear out. 

The Bible talks about three different kinds of peace. Let’s look at them: 

(1) Peace with others. “As far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Ro 12:18 NIV). This is external peace, and it’s necessary for human relationships to flourish. 

(2) Peace with yourself. “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts” (Col 3:15 NIV). This is internal peace, a rest of mind and soul that escapes most of us. 

(3) Peace with God.“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ” (Ro 5:1 NIV). 

This is eternal peace, and it comes from knowing you’ve a right relationship with God. So here’s how it works: When you’re at peace with God you’ll be at peace with yourself, and when you’re at peace with yourself you’ll be at peace with others. That, in a nutshell, is the peace process!

WHAT MIGHT EXCEPTIONAL LEADERSHIP LOOK LIKE?

A great post by Dave Kraft.

Leadership is on a lot of lips and minds today.  Christian organizations are constantly on the hunt for gifted, called and anointed leaders, but few know how to actually identify, recruit and develop the leaders they need and want. Experience has taught me that it is much easier for someone to want to be known as a leader than to actually be a leader--an exceptional leader. We already have enough mediocre and/or average leaders. 

I have been studying and practicing leadership for over forty years.  I continue to grow in both leading and learning how to lead better. I read all I can on the subject. I’m not what I want to be or what I will be, but at least I’m not what I was…even last year. By God’s grace I’m still a life-long learner…trusting Jesus to be excellent in how I lead others.

What does excellent leadership really look like? How would you personally define excellent leadership? What qualities are high on your list?

To get the ball rolling on what excellent, stellar and exceptional leadership looks like, here are four attributes that have been on my mind lately. This is not meant to be exhaustive…just a few I have been thinking and praying about.

HONESTY: 

Telling the truth at all times and at all costs. Being a person who says what he means and means what he says…consistency between what is said and what is done. (See Psalm 15:4B)

FOLLOW-THROUGH: 

Sees things through to completion. Doesn’t make promises that aren’t kept. Takes responsibility seriously; doesn’t intentionally or lazily let things fall through the cracks. Owns sin and mistakes without playing the blame game.

COURAGE:

Makes the tough calls and confronts when necessary. Decides when it’s as clear as it’s ever going to be without trying to keep everybody happy or being afraid to make a mistake. Show me a leader who never made a mistake and I’ll show you a leader who never “made” anything

CARING: 

Genuinely cares. Affirms and encourages the people being led. Not in it for personal gain or accolades (See I Peter 5:1-3). Leadership is not about the leader, but about Jesus and those He has entrusted to the leader.

In my opinion, excellent leadership would include ALL FOUR of these. What do you think? Please add a few at the top of your list that would separate an average leader from an exceptional leader.

The three most prominent idols in Western churches

Thanks to Dave Kraft for posting this!

Much has been written about leadership and church idolatry .

Here is Tim Keller on the three biggest idols in Western churches today. It will really get you thinking.

Tim Keller sat down with Jefferson Bethke way back when to discuss the idols that are most prominent in western churches. You can watch the full video here, or you can just read below to gather Tim’s thoughts.

In Keller’s eyes, here are the three biggest idols in western churches today, followed up with secondary points that Keller includes:

1) Experience. 

Instead of looking to the Word of God to be their norm and their guide, people tend to look to their own experience, feelings, intuitions, and impressions to be their guide.

This is part of American individualism.

Emotion and expression are very good, but when you make it more important than the Word of God, or put it higher than the Word of God, it becomes an idol.

2) Doctrine.

This might surprise some people that I say this.

But I do think some people make an idol out of doctrine.

There are some sectors of the church that say if you have your doctrine straight, and if you have your doctrine right, then you’re pleasing to God.

If you have your doctrine right, they say, then you are part of the solution, not the problem: you’re not heretical like everyone else.

There is a pride and a smugness about having good doctrine that, to me, almost puts it into the place of the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

3) Consumerism. 

Instead of looking to the church to give themselves into community, people look to the church to get the services they want.They have emotional, vocational, and relational needs and they go to a church because it is a good place to network.

People see the church as a mall, rather than a family that they give themselves to.

Consumerism becomes the idol — that is, my felt needs become an idol; they are more important than being apart of a community.

From Keller’s point of view, these idols are the ones that are most prominent. But this is not the consensus — not every church struggles with the same idol in the same way. Keller adds, “These idols don’t exist equally across the whole church. Certain sectors of the church struggle more than others, but these idols are all there, and they hurt us quite a bit.”

THE LONG-NOSE LEADER

A great post by Dan Rockwell!

You can’t bring out the best in others while looking down your nose.Devalued people perform below their potential.

You need a nose job if you:

1. Think about what others do wrong and what you do right.
2. Interrupt while others are talking.
3. Focus on weaknesses in others and strengths in yourself.
4. One up. Whatever you do is always better than what others do.
5. Minimize the progress others make and magnify the progress you make. Long-nose leaders are surrounded by people who aren’t good enough.
6. Tear down others to build up yourself.
7. Text during meetings.

Surround yourself:

They say great leaders surround themselves with people who are better than themselves. How are you looking up-to, rather than down-on, the people around you?

Lousy leaders look down on people they should look up to.

The more self-important you become the less successful you are. Superiority in leaders breeds inferiority in teams. Most will go along. Some will leave before they confront your long nose.

Position perverts perspective.

7 ways to give yourself leadership nose job:

1. Invite others to give you negative feedback. When was the last time someone corrected you?
2. Invite a teammate to help you improve your leadership. Adopt a learners attitude.
3. Go to your boss and ask them to help you improve something.
4. Hang out with front-line employees, regularly. Have lunch in the lunch room twice a week.
5. Explore suggestions. “Tell me more.” Every time you explain why things shouldn’t change you solidify the past.
6. Stop gossiping.
7. Say thank you. Take gratitude walks on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons.
8. Make service your guiding light.
9. Enable others to outshine you.
10. Share what you’re learning from mistakes.

OH LORD IT’S HARD TO BE HUMBLE!

You never fully become a leader. Goals are achieved. Character is pursued. Humility is the most challenging pursuit.  All character qualities are illusive. Courage, restraint, and love have new expressions in new circumstances. One day’s success is, at best, another days platform.

Humility of all character qualities is most illusive. Mac Davis mockingly sang, “Oh Lord it’s Hard to be Humble.”

Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble

when you’re perfect in every way.

I can’t wait to look in the mirror

cause I get better looking each day.

To know me is to love me

I must be a hell of a man.

Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble

but I’m doing the best that I can.

Humility a Constant Pursuit!

Leaders who pursue humility are always just beginning, regardless of their attainment.  Arrogance arrives. Humility is pursuit!

How to be humble:

1) Show up to serve. Answer arrogance with service every time!

1. Think about what you’re giving more than what you’re getting.
2. Walk through every door ready to serve others.
3. Live beyond yourself. Don’t neglect yourself.  Service expands leadership.

Self-interest is normal. Other-interest is the beginning of extraordinary.  Think about this statement!

All acts of leadership are service.

1. Begin every conversation by whispering in your own ear, “How might I serve?”
2. Lead every meeting with an attitude of service.
3. Face every challenge by asking, “How may I bring value?”
4. Address every tough conversation prepared to pour into others.

2) Enable others to outshine you.  You aren’t leading when you steal the spotlight.

1. Celebrate the strengths of others.
2. Provide opportunities for others to shine.
3. Pour into others until they outperform you.

The real test of humility is pouring yourself into someone and having them outperform you.

Why many leaders have few, or no, close friends!

We all need friends as we travel through life. Pastors and leaders at times find this difficult; not knowing who they can trust or want to have close to them. Many have been burned, betrayed or abused and are reluctant to try again. Here are some reasons from Chuck Lawless why pastors/leaders have few close friends.

Originally posted by Chuck Lawless

Why pastors have few deep friendships

I’ve heard it so many times that I almost expect it: pastors are lonely. They often minister among people they say they love, but don’t know well. They have few deep friendships. Here are 

10 reasons why we struggle with finding friends: 

1.  Someone taught us never to have close friendships in a church. Several of my seminary professors and most of my early mentors told me never to get close to church members. I’m grateful now that I didn’t listen well – but I have friends who continue to follow that advice.

2.  We’ve been hurt in the past.  I understand why my professors and mentors said what they said. They had risked being vulnerable with church members, and it cost them. Their openness led only to pain, and they don’t the next generation of leaders to experience the same.

3.  We assume this ministry is not our last one.  If we think that this church is only one stop on our ministry journey, it’s harder to develop deep friendships. Who wants to invest deeply when you know this role is a fleeting one?

4.  Many of us are introverted.  Even people who speak publicly every week can be introverted and private. I suspect church members would be surprised by how many of us are drained by events like fellowship dinners. We sometimes seclude ourselves just to get some rest.

5.  Others are uncomfortable around us.  I remember a church member whose family never invited me to dinner because they thought their dishes weren’t good enough for their pastor. That struck me as odd, not only because I’m just a normal guy, but also because most of my dinners at the time were delivered through a drive-thru window!

6.  Our spouse has been hurt. We can often handle it when our feelings are hurt, but it’s tougher when our spouse has been wounded. Protecting our spouse from hurt sometimes means avoiding deep relationships.

7.  We don’t want anyone to know us well. For pastors who admit this reason, it’s often because we don’t like who we are. We know we need to do better in our devotions. We fear others will see that we don’t always love, evangelize, or minister like we should.

8.  We get tired of people. It’s not that we don’t love people; it’s just that it feels like we’re around people all the time. Taking a break from people, though, usually means closing the door to friendships.

9.  Some of us were raised in churches with superficial relationships. At some level, we’re all products of our upbringing. When you’re raised around surface-level Christian friendships, that kind of relationship might be all you know. 

10.  Even believers get jealous and competitive. As pastors, we fear getting too close to particular people, lest others get angry. And, even among pastors, we struggle getting to know one another because we compete against each other for members. In the end, everybody loses.

Regardless of your prior experiences, what will you do (with His help)  to build a few solid friendships? 

Michael W. Smith - Christ Be All Around Me (Live) ft. Leeland Mooring

'Your life your death, your blood was shed for every moment!'  

Christ is in every moment of your day - be conscious of it, thankful for his grace and may every breath and every act be for his glory!  Can I hear an amen?