How to Be Yourself, not Someone Else

Awesome post by by Rick Warren

“But who are you, my friend, to talk back to God? A clay pot does not ask the man who made it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” (Romans 9:20 TEV)  Since God knows what’s best for us, we should gratefully accept the way he has fashioned us. The Bible says, “But who are you, my friend, to talk back to God? A clay pot does not ask the man who made it, ‘Why did you make me like this?’” (Romans 9:20 TEV) Your shape was sovereignly determined by God for his purpose, so you shouldn’t resent it or reject it. Instead of trying to reshape yourself to be like someone else, you should celebrate the shape God has given only to you. “Christ has given each of us special abilities — whatever he wants us to have out of his rich storehouse of gifts” (Ephesians 4:7 LB). Part of accepting your shape is recognizing your limitations. Nobody is good at everything, and no one is called to be everything. We all have defined roles. Paul understood that his calling was not to accomplish everything or please everyone but to focus only on the particular ministry God had shaped him for (Galatians 2:7-8). He said, “We will boast only about what has happened within the boundaries of the world God has given us, which includes our working with you” (2 Corinthians 10:13 NLT). The word “boundaries” refers to the fact that God assigns each of us a field or sphere of service. Your shape determines your specialty. When we try to overextend our ministry reach beyond what God shaped us for, we experience stress. Just as each runner in a race is given a different lane to run in, we must individually “run with patience the particular race that God has set before us” (Hebrews 12:1 LB). Don’t be envious of the runner in the lane next to you; just focus on finishing your race. God wants you to enjoy using the shape he has given you. The Bible says, “Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else” (Galatians 6:4 NLT). Satan will try to steal the joy of service from you in a couple of ways: by tempting you to compare your ministry with others, and by tempting you to conform your ministry to the expectations of others. Both are deadly traps that will distract you from serving in the ways God intended. Whenever you lose your joy in ministry, start by considering if either one of these temptations is the cause. Talk It Over Why do you think it’s so easy to compare ourselves to others, even in ministry? How does doing so affect our service and the Body of Christ? How has God shaped you for ministry? What are some of the limitations to your shape? How do you know what God’s expectations are for you in your particular ministry? What do you think they are?

How to Ignite Fire

A Great post by Dan Rockwell.

The first job of leadership is catching a glimpse of who you are. Leaders who don’t know who they are end up defined by others and pushed around by position or title.

Don’t lose yourself.

Don’t get your hopes up. There’s no quick and easy way to figure out who you are. There’s no shortcut or conclusion either.

Freedom:

When you know and accept who you are:

1. Jobs don’t define you.
2. Arrogance doesn’t blind you.
3. Expectations from others don’t master you.

Through the fog:

Glimpses of the real you appear in the fog when you reflect on your strengths, weaknesses, joys, and frustrations.

Self-reflection:

Skills, strategies, and methods are machines punching out widgets until “you” bring them to life.
I found a three step self-reflection exercise in, “Lead Positive,” to help you find fire.

Step 1:
Complete this sentence, “When I am at my best, I am a leader who is ________.”

Now, complete the sentence four more times.

Step 2:
Complete, “If I were an even more effective leader, I would be ________.”

Other-reflection:

You’re blind to who you really are. Others help you see. That’s why you need step three.

Step 3:
Ask one or two of your colleagues to reflect on you and complete steps one and two with you in mind.

When (your name) is at his/her best, he/she is a leader who is ________.

If (your name) were an even more effective leader, he/she would be ________.

Fire:

Fire ignites when you bringing your true self to challenges and opportunities. Boredom dominates when you lose yourself to position, expediency, and expectation.

Leaders who bring themselves to challenges and opportunities engage in effortless effort.

Show some Grace!

Love this post by Rick Warren


“Love never stops being patient.” 1 Corinthians 13:7a (GW)

No relationship will make it without grace. This is part of lasting love! You’ve got to cut people some slack. You’ve got to let things go.

The Bible says, “Love never stops being patient.” 1 Corinthians 13:7a (GW). The Message paraphrase of that verse says it “puts up with anything.” The New Century Version says it “patiently accepts all things.” And the New Jerusalem Bible translation says it is “always ready to make allowances.” You have to allow for mistakes.
The word in Greek that says it’s “always patient” is the word that literally means “covered with a roof.” Would you buy a house without a roof? Of course not. You’d have no protection from the winds and the rain. A roof covers and protects your home.

In the same way, a patient, gracious love covers a relationship and lets some things slide. Why is this so important?

Because you’re imperfect, and your spouse is imperfect. You’re imperfect, and your friend is imperfect. Two imperfect people will never create a perfect relationship. There’s no such thing as a perfect marriage or a perfect friendship, so stop trying to find one.

Romans 3:10 says, “There is no one who always does what is right, not even one.” The Bible also says, “If we say that we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and refusing to accept the truth.” 1 John 1:8 (LB).
We have to extend grace to each other, because forgiveness is a two way street. You cannot receive what you are unwilling to give to other people.
If you’re going to have a love that lasts, you’ve got to learn to make allowances for the mistakes of others. That’s called grace.
Talk It Over

• What is the difference in approving of others’ mistakes and making allowances for their mistakes?
• From whom have you sought forgiveness? Have you also been willing to offer it to that person?

How can you extend grace practically in your relationships today?

Navigating the Line Between Brash and Bold

A great post by Dan Rockwell

 

Boldness ruins fools.

Boldness doesn’t answer leadership issues. It causes many.

The line between brash and bold is:

1. Experience.
2. Maturity.
3. Counsel.
4. Preparation.
5. Perseverance.
6. Reflection.
7. Friendships.

Unskilled leaders with boldness get into more trouble than timid.  Boldness whispers, “Move out.” Caution yells, “Stay put.”  Reasonable preparation answers both.

Wise boldness:

1. Visit the what-could-go-wrong office, but don’t camp there. Prudence asks, “What could go wrong?” Boldness asks, “Where can we make progress?” Blind boldness destroys. Wise boldness prepares.
2. Filter suggestions and criticisms through the lense of what matters. “How much does this matter?” Distraction ruins boldness, but foolish boldness ignores others.
3. Know boldness without persistence is bravado. Brash begins. Boldness finishes.
4. Move toward quick wins while keeping the finish line in mind. Boldness moves toward opportunities. Brash just talks.
5. Choose what not to do, at least for now. Postpone if you can’t eliminate.
6. Build alliances.
7. Create diversity.

Growth and boldness:

Growth requires boldness. You grow on the fringes of discomfort where shadows of uncertainty lurk. Boldness whispers, “Step toward the edge.” Uncertainty is the hammer of growth. Boldness takes you there.

Belief and boldness:

Boldness without belief is delusion.  Don’t pressure yourself into boldness. Find reasonable grounds to believe you can find answers, solve problems, and move forward. Keep belief on a short leash. Don’t point it to the distant future. Point it toward today.

Leadership and boldness:

Leaders instill boldness in others when they:

1. Start with trust.
2. Connect tasks with purpose.
3. Stand with those who screw up. Loyalty builds boldness.
4. Acknowledge tough challenges. Leaders who ignore hard truths create uncertainty.
5. Clarify the path ahead.
6. Trumpet their intentions.
7. Practice candor with kindness.
8. Treat people with equity.
9. Say, “Go for it,” and mean it.
10. Bring people together.

The privilege of leadership is inspiring boldness.

How might boldness ruin leaders?

What does wise boldness look like?

Boldness requires Grace

A challenging article by Dan Rockwell!

Boldness takes you further than timidity. But, boldness is dangerous. Lack of boldness is bedfellow to inaction. But, boldness is an ugly beast when taken too far.

The sins of inaction destroy more than failure.
It takes character and skill to act boldly with grace.

Bad boldness:

1. Uses anger and fear as energy.
2. Reacts “against” more than pushes “forward.”
3. Is loud in private and quiet in public.
4. Bowls people over, unnecessarily.
5. Is arrogant, rude, and ill mannered. .
6. Acts like an angry child when it doesn’t get it’s way.
7. Takes revenge and holds grudges.

Anything worth doing requires boldness.

10 qualities of graceful boldness. Boldness enables leaders to:

1. Face uncertainty with grace, confidence, and realistic optimism.
2. Keep trying when progress is slow.
3. Serve when underappreciated. Rise above self-pity.
4. Rethink.
5. Say, “I don’t know.”
6. Accept correction with gratitude.
7. Change course.
8. Try again after failure.
9. Take action when failure matters.
10. Express what’s in your heart.

Leadership requires boldness.

7 Ways to find graceful boldness:

1. Keep doing stuff until you find what you really love, then keep doing what you love.
2. Humility is the heart of healthy boldness. Put others at the center, not yourself. The greatest freedom is seeking another’s highest good.
3. “You develop courage by doing courageous things, small things, but things that cost you some exertion– mental and, I suppose, spiritual exertion.” Maya Angelou
4. Cultivate friends who bolster your boldness. Invite people into your life who see your frailties and believe in your potential.
5. Embrace restlessness and discontent with a “make it better,” not a, “make it perfect,” approach. Perfectionism is fear in disguise.
6. Treat people with kindness, generosity, and high expectations.
7. Forgive offenses quickly. But, hold people accountable.

How can leaders develop boldness?

What does graceful boldness look like to you?

Waiting for Things to Change

US02052014.mp3

02:05/02:16

“How long, O Lord, must I call for help?”    Hab 1:2 NIV

Are you waiting for your vision to start coming to pass, or to find a solution to a problem you’re facing, or for the first signs of fulfillment to a promise God has made you? You’re not the first person to struggle with the idea of waiting, and you won’t be the last. Furthermore, when you get what you’re waiting for now, you’ll begin waiting for something else. If there’s one word that defines Christian living, it’s - waiting. 

God said to the prophet Habakkuk, “The revelation awaits an appointed time…and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay” (Hab 2:3 NIV). Why did God say that? Because He was answering the prophet’s question, “How long, O Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen?” Look at the patriarch Job. Covered in boils and totally bankrupt, he says, “If a man dies, shall he live again? All the days of my hard service I will wait, till my change comes” (Job 14:14 NKJV). 

Waiting for things to change is not easy. So what should you do while you’re waiting? Pour yourself into the job at hand; otherwise you’ll shortchange your own future. James writes, “Be patient…See how the farmer waits for the land to yield its valuable crop and how patient he is for the autumn and spring rains. You too, be patient and stand firm” (Jas 5:7-8 NIV). What God has in store for you is worth any price you have to pay and any season of waiting you have to go through.

Big shout out for YOUversion